Waffles & Ice Cream

Okay for those of you that really know me, know that certain comforts of mine come from certain foods. I love to eat! Most of us do, and I don't indulge in a way that causes me to get sick, and I wouldn't call myself an emotional eater, in fact I'm the opposite, but there is a great sense of relaxation in certain foods. In my high school years attending Dobbins AVTS "93" I thought I might add(smile) I used to have to stay with my best friend, and that was Grandmom for others Mrs. Young. It brings a smile to my face whenever I mention her, followed by tears of joy for having the chance to even know her. Anybody that really knew me then had to know of Mrs. Young. If you didn't come to know who I adored & loved, then we probably weren't as close as we shoulda or coulda been. Mrs. Young was like Sunoco gas station I came to her to refuel for the wisdom, knowledge, and faith she would instill in me. I came to understanding love, humbleness, and patience knowing her. Before leaving school throughout the week she would make sure she was stocked on the ice cream & waffles. Why? Because it was my favorite! She would wake me up in the morning never needing an alarm clock, and tell me it's waffles & ice cream downstairs, and I got you up in time enough to have it. I used to sit in the kitchen daily enjoying every spoonful of warmness combined with coolness as it was easily digested thinking of why I loved her.  I thought about how loving she was, how comforting she was, how peaceful she was. Grandmom spoke with her smile, you felt her sincere concern for you without her mentioning it. She would ask me sometimes what's the latest thing out? So I can make sure you have it, when I get my social security check next month. Or what you want me to buy when I go food shopping this week? I would say Grandmom just waffles & ice cream. She would say you love that huh? It wasn't the most nutritional thing for your morning, but mentally it was the healthiest thing for me. On Nov.13, 1998 I remember shopping out in the Northeast section and receiving a call stating she was close to taking her last breath. I pulled in the parking lot, turned my car off and quietly said a prayer. Lord I'm asking that you please give me the chance to be at her side as she take that last breath, please Amen. So driving from Bustleton ave to 20th & Cambria was like driving from Tarboro NC to the city of Philadelphia. However, when I arrived without hesitation I proceeded up stairs and there she was lying in bed and still breathing. Thank you Lord I said as I began to get in the bed next to her, and I rested my head upon her chest. I told her I understand why your trying to hold on but all will be well. Guess what? Remember you told me despite what they said I would get the house, well I'm due to make settlement. Don't worry your plans with your home will follow through, and your requests will be well respected. At that point a song by Kirk Franklin came to mind "The storm is over now" so that's what I began to sing, and before the song was over I heard a loud gasp for air which was her last.  As I looked up into her face I closed her eyes, and began to think how am I going to make it? I knew I had to do that for her, to offer that assurance that all would be well, but seriously that would be the only lie I ever told her. It's not possible I thought, none of this makes any sense. I can't even began to explain how difficult it was for me to grieve properly. I made up in my mind I would never go down that block again, I didn't know if I could handle if someone rearranged her porch furniture, or color on her brick stone front. I recall a friend of mine told me at that time maybe instead of avoiding it one day you need to just get one of her favorite things to eat & sit on the bottom of her steps and face it. I couldn't even imagine that and to be honest I never did it. Now at this time of my life facing what I'm facing I don't need another Doctor appointment but an appointment with Mrs. Young, not literally(smile). So how can I refuel at the gas station that no longer exist? Well, I popped two buttermilk blueberry waffles in the toaster, and topped it with ice cream....Thankful for having known you....Mrs. Young your spirit lives within me, I hear you, and I know...Believe God, I got you:)